Well I know you don’t remember me now or the time when we were friends but I’d like to believe that you do. I want to believe that you still think of me. Whenever someone says ‘whatever’, my name crosses your mind. Or may be whenever the song is played which you’d once dedicated to me, you realise that you still feel the same. I imagine myself saying ‘yes’ to you that day and how things could have been different. I wonder how things could have taken a different turn, had I attended that wedding. What if i had agreed to meet you that day in Jaipur. What if I stood a little longer on that porch. What if we were together. I keep thinking this. I keep replaying those conversations in my head and see if I could have said something, something to make you stay. But there aren’t any second chances in love. There is no place for ‘if’ in love. And love does happen twice but definitely not with the same person. And so I know you are never coming back. We can never be there again. And so there isn’t any need for continual flashbacks which keep happening. Sometimes I wish I get over you and stop thinking about you. But then there are times when I don’t want to let go off imaginary you and my real feelings. Now that I think about it, it comes across as sad and depressing but then I really can’t do anything about it. I can’t stop feeling about you. I can’t stop imagining a world where we are together. A world where you love me care for me like you did before. And you thought of no one but me. Alas that world doesn’t exist. But that doesn’t mean it never will. I still believe we will meet someday at the right day
, right moment and right time. Not when I want to or expect to see you. But some day when I least expect it. And that day I’ll know if my imaginations were real or that was just my stupid brain playing cruel game with my heart. Until then these imaginations are part of me. You are part of me. I am done hating you. You don’t deserve hatred, cuz you’ve done no harm. You deserve all the happiness, and how I wish that’s with me. But again I’ll wait for that one day to know if it’s real.